Response to: “Is there anything you've given up minimized or banned from your home to make the house run smoother?”So this is not a thing per se, but I remember being in the waiting room for an ob appointment before my 2nd was born talking to another mom, she was having number 8. I told her I didn’t know how she could do it and was so amazed. She said what helped her most was being ok with things not being perfect. I definitely have seen what a big difference that’s been for me, trying to let go of perfectionism and controlling everything. I think so often as parents we look around and compare and think our kids need to be concert pianists and soccer all-stars and in this lesson and that program. All those things are absolutely great and wonderful and enriching, but there’s only so many hours in a day, threads of patience in a parent, and for most people money in the bank. We tried so many sports with my oldest, nothing fit, I felt like I must be doing something wrong when all his friends were joking comp teams for various sports, but then in jr high he finally found his thing, even though he had tried it plenty of times in his younger years, but in jr high it finally just clicked for him. So I’d say letting go of the comparing and expectations and perfectionism and just doing your best, knowing your best is enough, you are enough as a parent, that your love and encouragement is what your kiddo needs more than anything else, and that is enough, everything else is a bonus. Your kiddo is going to turn out awesome and exactly who they are supposed to be even if they aren’t the best at something, don’t make the team, or don’t do the program.
Response to: “What's your stance on allowances?”Right now we don’t have an allowance per say, we have certain things the kids need to do everyday that’s just part of being the family team, and there are additional things they can do to earn money. It gives them the chance to be self starters and choose how hard they want to work, and earning that money helps them learn to mange their wants and savings goals. We do match anything they put in their account to save.
Response to: “What’s the most important part of your bedtime routine with the kids, and why?”There are a few parts bedtime that’s been so rewarding and connecting for our family, and it’s definitely not teeth brushing time. 🤣 When my kiddos were little, at their bedtime they got to choose 3 picture books for me to read to them. They loved getting to choose, I loved that there is no asking for more books, and we both loved the time it give us to snuggle and connect. Now that they’re a bit older we still read, but usually a chapter of a book as a family. We also take a few minutes to talk individually, and as they’ve gotten older that might be my very favorite part of tuck in. It takes a little more time, but I feel like they are most likely to open up when we’re winding down and when we’ve just connected with books and snuggles.
Response to: “What’s one thing you need on a beach day with the kids?”Baggie for collecting seashells or other treasures. Ziplocks works great, or I love this waterproof pouch. https://aloha-collection.com/products/small-samudra-x-aloha-kalapana?variant=40256960692247
Response to: “Favorite sunscreen (for you, not the kids) that won't make you go blind temporarily?”Hands down, Super Goop Unseen Sunscreen. It is feather light and effective. I’ve never had it irritate my eyes. It’s pricey for sure, so I only use on my face and don’t let my kids use it. https://supergoop.com/products/unseen-sunscreen?variant=40722206752866&utm_source=GOOGLE&utm_medium=Paid-Search&utm_campaign=21608162630&utm_content=166375410436&utm_term=&gad_source=1&gbraid=0AAAAADYnz0ezvS5JGDgSfx6Dpmjd4ptvk&gclid=Cj0KCQjwo8S3BhDeARIsAFRmkOPOj-JQaSN4f0fM-fAmCzF6qn79PqKhUdGHESPL5d5HHiWAA8gms1waAsigEALw_wcB&gclsrc=aw.ds
Response to: “looking for ideas for a *complicated* Halloween handout 🎃”These are all such fun ideas! One thing I’ve done with elementary kiddos at school parties is to make a punch-a-bunch like on price is right. There’s lots of ways to do this, but I hot glued solo cups on a foam board (I did mine in the shape of a heart for a valentines class party, but you could do a pumpkin) and the put a treat or temporary tattoo or whatever in the cups, cover with a square of tissue paper (I used red, pink and white with hearts, but you could use orange and black), and secure each with a rubber band around the opening of the cup. The kids love punching through the tissue paper to see what surprise they get.
Response to: “What advice would you give yourself as a first-time parent?”I’d say (from a book a friend recommended) “present over perfect.” It can be tempting to compare yourself or your kids to others. But don’t! Every parent and family has different situations, priorities, values, strengths, and struggles. Every child learns and grows different things and at different times. Learn from other’s examples and interactions, but the minute it turns into you doubting yourself it’s no longer helpful. Focus on what you’re doing right and what matters most to you. Celebrate your wins, be proud of yourself, be proud of your kids, look for the good. Choose generous and uplifting thoughts for and about yourself, and your kids. It’s easy to judge yourself (and others) too harshly so give yourself (and others) the most generous interpretation. You don’t have to be perfect and neither do your kids. Your presence and love is far more meaningful and important to your kids, yourself, and your relationship than anything being perfect.
Response to: “What are your favorite Halloween-themed childrens books?”Holiday books are a bit of an obsession, I get a new Halloween book every year. Our top favorites are: They’re Coming! (Love the illustrations and magical feeling, probably our most favorite Halloween book of all!) https://a.co/d/9IoX16M Too Many Pumpkins (This book is so beautiful, both the illustrations and the message) https://a.co/d/dYIj60e The Halloween Kid (such a fun read aloud) https://a.co/d/bvzZTod There’s a Ghost in This House (I adore Oliver Jeffers and this is so cute!) https://a.co/d/7UYT8eV Gustavo the Shy Ghost https://a.co/d/9SADSEm Bonaparte Falls Apart https://a.co/d/5Tu2cez The Old Lady who was not Afraid of Anything https://a.co/d/b2sBd0i The Spooky Wheels on the Bus (we read this so many times when my kids were little that it is literally falling apart). https://a.co/d/a4TSQfo
Response to: “What’s your go-to dinner recipe when you need a quick, healthy meal?”I usually have leftover cooked or rotisserie chicken and left over crusty bread or sandwich rolls in the freezer. I use whatever cheese I have in the fridge, grate it, toss it with a bit of cornstarch, and add it to the fondue pot filled with simmering chicken/bone broth and a bit of garlic paste to make a cheese fondue. Serve it with the chicken, bread, whatever veggies and fruit are around. So easy, fast and yum!
Response to: “What are some of the expert parenting resources that you love?”I agree 1,000,000% about Dr. Becky Good Inside! I love the podcast, emails, and courses. Since Rachel already gave an awesome answer about that amazing resource I’ll add another amazing resource that I love so much! Brooke Romney. I follow her on instagram and get her emails and always feel uplifted and empowered after reading her stuff. She has great resources, especially for parenting teens, a phase I’m in, but she also has great resources for parenting in general. I especially love her Modern Manners books for teens and kids!! I have all 3 versions. I keep one near the kitchen table so we can flip to the next one each week, the kids can read it and get awesome advice from someone who isn’t their parent, and we can talk about it casually. 52 Modern Manners for Kids https://a.co/d/bK8mQA4