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Response to: “What are your must-have items for traveling with kids and why?”We’ve always been a travel-loving family. Before we had kids, we loved to travel super light, carry-ons only, and went all over the world with itty little roller bags - I hadn’t seen a baggage claim conveyer belt in years! Once we had littles in tow though, we realized pretty quickly that you need to lug a LOT more stuff along. I don’t like lugging stuff that isn’t going to be useful, so I did mad amounts of research on gear. Here’s my list of essentials that earned their place on the road with us. Some of these are to keep the kids happy. A lot are to keep us parents sane (which, I suppose, also keeps the kids happy.) # Babies, <2 year old The Doona Stroller: ohh how we loved our Doona! It’s so convenient, switching from an infant car seat to a stroller and back in a flash and it was so easy to load it in and out of airplane seats, taxis, and rental cars. The only downside is that kids tend to outgrow it quickly, at around a year old, but before that it’s a game changer! https://www.amazon.com/Doona-Infant-Seat-Latch-Base/dp/B08VWWQ96T Melissa and Doug Water Wow: I always had several of these in my carry-on while traveling. They keep kids entertained and they don’t make a mess. We also loved Melissa and Doug’s reusable puffy stickers. Pretty sure we’ve left a few small puffy animals stuck to unreachable-except-by-tiny-baby-fingers corners in planes. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N4984OL and https://www.amazon.com/Melissa-Doug-Reusable-Adventures-Stickers Waterproof wet bag: Very useful for wet clothes, swimsuits, or anything else that you don’t want leaking all over the place. You could always use ziplocks, but reusable is nice. I like the Bumkins bags because they also look pretty cute! One might be an exhausted parent running pell mell through an airport with a poopy diaper in one hand, but one still has standards, dagnabbit! https://www.amazon.com/dp/B019EGMK4E Squeezy Snacker baby food pouch: I really love this reusable baby food pouch. It’s very easy for a baby to eat from it, but no matter how much they squish it with their ultra strong baby hands, it simply will not spill. On the flip side, I did have to open it up repeatedly to reassure curious TSA officers that this was just a smoothie. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01A0X9W78 # Preschoolers: 2-4 years WayB Pico travel carseat: There was one painful year after we outgrew the Doona when we had to lug a big carseat along and that was annoying, but once we aged into the WayB, things got a lot easier again. It’s lightweight, packs into a backpack, and takes about 5 minutes to install in a rental car or (hopefully patient) taxi. https://www.amazon.com/WAYB-Carrying-Lightweight-Portable-Foldable/dp/B0C1P2YZ5S Flyaway Kids Bed: This is amazing for longer international flights! It turns the seat into a comfy lie flat bed. It’s a little unwieldy to inflate/deflate on the plane, but so worth it when half the family is happy and well rested at touchdown. https://www.flyawaydesigns.com/products/flyaway-kids-bed Puro Kids Headphones: I love that these are volume limited to safe levels. They’re also easily adjustable, very comfortable, and have amazing battery life. And they come in fun colors. https://www.amazon.com/Puro-Sound-Labs-Plus-Headphones/dp/B0C3TJDLW5 ## Activity books, lift-the-flap books, drawing pads, seek-and-find books: - Playtown Lift the Flap - it’s a bit large, but provided hours of entertainment - https://www.amazon.com/dp/0312517378) - All Around Bustletown - these books are beautifully illustrated and full of tiny little details. https://www.amazon.com/Around-Bustletown-Rotraut-Susanne-Berner\ - Pretty much anything else that will hold a crayon mark. Hiccapop Inflatable Toddler Bed: These worked great for that in-between stage after the kids had outgrown hotel cribs and pack-and-plays but before they could comfortably claim a grown up bed without rolling off the side at night. https://www.amazon.com/hiccapop-Inflatable-Toddler-Portable-Mattress # Kindergartners: 5+ years Ride Safer Travel vest: Ultra light and very portable, these still feel very secure and it’s easy to get in and out of them. There’s also a tether attachment for extra safety - we use that when we have a rental car or expect a longer drive, but it isn’t needed for short taxi rides. https://www.amazon.com/Backpack-Wearable-Lightweight-Portable-Everyday-Rideshare/dp/B07WMTQHCL Educational books and learning materials… yeah, who am I kidding. Screen time rules go out the window as soon as we step into the airport. https://www.apple.com/ipad/
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Response to: “What advice would you give yourself as a first-time parent?”This one’s a bit technical, but I wish I’d known about the link between eczema and serious food allergies. Both my kids developed eczema at around 2 months old, but with my first, our pediatrician just told us casually to keep her skin moisturized and so I had no idea how dangerous an unbroken skin barrier was. I was eating a ton of peanuts and cashews to increase my breastmilk supply, and all that nut dust was constantly on my hands and on her inflamed skin, training her immune system to treat it as an irritant and the enemy. She’s now allergic to peanuts and cashews. With my second, I had learned a lot from our allergist and from poring over allergy research online so as soon as the eczema showed up, right on schedule at 2 months, I was ON IT with wet wraps and an array of creams. We also got rid of all nuts from the house until we could introduce solid foods at 4 months, when we started feeding him a blend of nut butters every day so his immune system would learn that these were food and not freak out. He has no allergies and can eat whatever he wants. I just wish I could have given his big sister that freedom. On a related note, I wish I could give myself more grace, and not to feel so much guilt over all the times I mess up.
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Response to: “What are your top Bay Area recommendations for families with kids in elementary school?”I heard about this Vincent family that’s supposed to be kinda fun to visit 😝😝😝😝 Besides that, here’s a small part of my list, in no particular order. Ferry Building Farmer’s Market - This is my absolute favorite thing to do in SF. We try to go almost every Saturday morning. There’s so much great food. The produce is fantastic and the kids LOVE getting to sample what’s in season. Acme has amazing bread. Miette has the prettiest candy. Dandelion has fantastic chocolate. Batter has the best cookies. And our absolute favorite, the Roli Roti food truck has the best porchetta sandwiches outside of Italy (a bold statement, I know, but I stand by it!) https://www.ferrybuildingmarketplace.com/farmers-market/ The Exploratorium - I love this museum. All about science and everything is super interactive and hands on. It’s very easy to spend a whole day there. https://www.exploratorium.edu/ Cal Academy of Sciences - lots of different science/animal exhibits, and it’s in Golden Gate Park so the surrounding area is also lovely. https://www.calacademy.org/ Monterey Bay Aquarium - a little bit of a drive from SF but this place is amazing and one of the best aquariums in the world. You could easily spend a whole weekend here. https://www.montereybayaquarium.org/ Glowfari at Oakland Zoo - After living in San Diego, Jon’s and my zoo bar is very high. Oakland Zoo isn’t anything particularly fancy during the day, but during the holidays, it gets pretty magical after dark. https://www.oaklandzoo.org/programs-and-events/glowfari Muir Woods - redwoods, squirrels, wilderness. Also insanely packed parking. https://www.nps.gov/muwo/index.htm Tilden Park Steam Train - cute steam train ride through the woods. https://www.visitberkeley.com/directory/tilden-park-steam-train/ All the usual SF things - cables cars, Ghirardelli square, Golden Gate bridge, Alcatraz, etc.
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Response to: “What is the best/most fun hotels you've ever stayed at with your kids?”Ooh, I have a lot of favorites but I’ll try and condense down to a few. If you asked our kids, they would probably vote for the Disney Aulani - amazing location, great pools, poolside shave ice, loads of activities on the beach, and all the Hawaii + Disney vibes. The biggest downside is that the actual food at their sit-down restaurants is pretty rubbish but the Four Seasons is right next door with way better food, so we usually just walk over to do breakfast/dinner there instead. And yeah, it’s a bit of a flight to get here. It’s an even LONGER flight to get here, but I absolutely loved the Shangri-La Rasa Sentosa in Singapore. Probably the most kid friendly hotel we’ve stayed at - gift baskets full of toys and candy at check in, complimentary kid-sized toiletries and water shoes and robes in the hotel room, the most amazing breakfast buffet, and a gorgeous pool with what appeared to be totally impromptu dance parties at random times during the day (complete with a million animal floaties and a DJ). Singapore also has a lot of fun activities for kids (and incredible food for everyone) so it’s very high on my list of favorite places to go. The Taj Madikeri in Coorg is probably the most beautiful resort I’ve stayed at in India - quite remote and hard to get to, but insanely gorgeous and relaxing. The villa we stayed in had a private indoor swimming pool surrounded by giant windows with views of the rainforest! And it was way more reasonably priced than fancy hotels in the US. On the flip side, there weren’t a ton of activities outside of swimming and nature walks through the forest. And finally, this is not really kid-related, but the absolute best breakfast buffet @jon and I have found was at the Hotel Vier Jahreszeiten in Munich. Room after room of gorgeously displayed artisanal meats, cheeses, pastries, jams, all with very high quality ingredients - I’ve never seen any other hotel reach quite that level of perfection (although the Crown Room brunch at the Hotel Del Coronado puts in a decent effort and gets medium close - the Del is also a fun hotel for other reasons, and very beautiful at Christmas with their beachfront ice rink)
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Response to: “How have you been able to get aligned with your partner on parenting styles?”This is super hard for us - we have very VERY different parenting styles. I skew heavily towards needing structure and organization, and Jon’s able to have a lot more fun with things. I’ve agonized plenty and in all honesty I totally wish I could be more like him, but I think I’ve been forced to accept that some things we’re just not going to align on and maybe it’s ok? I’ve seen some research online that points to the fact that it’s healthy for kids to see parents working through conflict together, and the kids seem to be pretty comfortable with the fact that we’re both very different people - they connect with us in totally different ways. We do try and align on broad strokes and big life decisions, but we’re different people with very different cultural backgrounds, so it is what it is. More tactically though, I do find that setting aside time for relatively objective discussions with a third party moderator helps a lot! In our case, we do a biweekly sync with our nanny and while that doesn’t change who I fundamentally am as a parent, it gives me perspective about where the kids are, what they’re dealing with, and what’s age appropriate behavior that I shouldn’t stress about too much. Also (this is very important!) having someone else in the conversation forces me to avoid pulling in other emotional baggage that’s totally irrelevant to the kids (which I would totally do if it were just the two of us discussing the kids at the end of the day when we’re already exhausted and burned out).
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Response to: “What’s your favorite episode of Bluey, and why?”Cricket, definitely! I grew up in a cricket-crazy country, and all of us played loads of backyard/street cricket, so the episode already has claim to a special nostalgic place in my heart. And when you add in the super sweet story, and the bit of magic at the end that always leaves me tears, it’s pretty hard to beat.
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Response to: “Can we start a big thread to talk about books?”Hidden gems (and some probably not so hidden) All Around Bustletown - these were quite popular a few years ago but if you haven’t seen these, the little details are so fun to look at for younger kids. https://www.amazon.com/dp/B0B18JKWCL Escargot - adorable book that should appeal to picky eaters. Ours is always read in an exaggerated French accent courtesy @jon so that makes it even funnier. https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B06XRHB1PX Hiccupotamus - this was a personal favorite (for me, that is - the kids liked it ok, I absolutely loved it). I loved the silly rhyming wordplay and completely ridiculous premise. https://www.amazon.com/Hiccupotamus-Aaron-Zenz/dp/0761456228 The Little Wooden Robot and the Log Princess - a sweet fairy tale about a brother and sister who take turns rescuing each other. No particular moral or message but I love how sweet and whimsical it is, and the art is adorable. https://www.amazon.com/Little-Wooden-Robot-Log-Princess/dp/0823446980 Pretty much anything by Jon Klassen: we’re big fans of his wry sense of humor. https://www.amazon.com/stores/Jon-Klassen/author/B00MXOB18Q Books I have a beef with. Not too many come to mind honestly, but here are two. The Pigeon books by Mo Willems - I find the pigeon excessively annoying. All those extreme reactions and tantrums and zero accountability for bad behavior. Can someone fry that bird already? Disclaimer: my kids adore the pigeon. A whole bucket of rainbows/princesses/fairies/unicorns: I don’t particularly have a beef with rainbows and fairies and unicorns per se - they’re all lovely - but the fact that there are eleventy billion books about these is a bit much. Who churns these out in such ridiculous numbers? Some of these have got to be AI generated at this point!
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Response to: “Stroller recommendations for international travel with baby and toddler (2 yrs)”We LOVED the Doona for under 1 year (https://doona.shop/) - being able to just have one thing that did both carseat and stroller was huge - we lived in downtown SF and didn’t own a car when our daughter was born, so that Doona got into taxis, buses, the subway, flights, all the things, and it was amazing! Beyond 1 year, we really liked the Bugaboo Ant (https://www.bugaboo.com/ca-en/strollers/bugaboo-ant/) - it collapses down small enough to fit in the overhead compartment on most planes, and was comfy enough to use until close to 4 years old (at which point it starts to get a little cramped).
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Response to: “Is there anything you've given up minimized or banned from your home to make the house run smoother?”I hold a pretty hard line on scheduled activities (sports, etc) not going past 6:00 pm. It lets us stick to a consistent, reasonable bedtime and that’s been pretty huge in making sure the kids have enough energy at the start of each day. It also gives us parents enough time at the end of the day to decompress. I will admit it’s often hard because a lot of activities are scheduled so late, so sometimes we have to drop a late soccer game or something like that, but it’s been very worth it for everyone’s sanity. (note: my kids are 4 and 6 - I can totally see us relaxing that rule as they get older and can handle a little less sleep)
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Response to: “What are some of the expert parenting resources that you love?”Probably controversial but I’m not a huge fan of self-proclaimed experts who claim to have the one true answer on how to raise kids. I prefer to lean on the village and get a lot of different opinions. I love online parenting forums and groups - I’ve found super helpful posts on reddit and berkeley parents network and my neighborhood facebook group, and it’s particularly useful when there are discussions on those posts, with people arguing different viewpoints and pros/cons of various approaches. https://www.reddit.com/r/Parenting The only times I looked to an “official authority” source was when I had very specific, almost technical, problems. For breastfeeding, I relied a ton on KellyMom (https://kellymom.com) and found it extremely useful. For potty training, I read through the Oh Crap book (https://a.co/d/eFafK1a) - that was pretty hit or miss - the methods in there didn’t always work, but some of the broader strokes around what not to do were helpful.